The Quest Is Over

For the past few months I have, when I run out of real food, tried various mixtures of Flour, Salt, Baking Soda, and Water sometimes incorporating eggs, or butter, or shortening, or the desperate tears I cry when I know something is likely to turn out terrible but I can’t stop myself. When I have stirred, kneaded, beaten, or flogged this mixture into a dough/batter/slightly gelatinous mess depending on what the recipe dictates I drop/pour it all into 350 degree oil to fry it up. I watch, patiently, as it browns and crisps before taking it out, draining it, and sprinkling it with sugar.

Up until now, the only part I liked was the sugar.

Sprinkled with cinnamon sugar

Mix the following together

1 cup flour

3/4 cups water

1/4 teaspoon salt

1/4 teaspoon baking powder

These should make a thickish batter, similar to that of pancakes.

Heat up your canola oil to 350 degrees. I have a candy/fat thermometer from my grandmother that I find very helpful for this particular purpose because I am forever too impatient to let oil heat properly but this helps me to see just how soon I’ll be able to splash things into the pan. I also do my frying in a cast-iron skillet, also my grandmother’s, because there are few ways to get a better finish on the inside of one of those puppies than just heating it up and soaking it in oil.

Smothered in chicken chili and veggies

I used a ladle and just dribbled in it in crazy patterns, and they turned out pretty fantastic like that.

Using a slotted spoon or something of that nature, take the whole mess and flip it over unless you’re doing it in something where the entirety is covered all at once by the oil. In which case, you need not flip and have no fear of soaking yourself in frighteningly hot fat. I found the use of a second spoon helpful for preventing the thing – I suppose it’s a type of bread? – from landing in the oil and instead being gently lowered for the other side to brown and crisp up properly.

When both sides are done to your satisfaction, take it out of the oil and place it on some paper towels if you have them. If you don’t, don’t worry greatly about it. I certainly don’t. Sprinkle with sugar, I used regular granulated but suspect that powdered would cling better. Oh well, you can always mop up the extra with the bread as you break of bits and pieces of it. This is really quite easy and fun to make, not to mention cheap!

I also pretended to bake a toddler sweater today.

Baby Soft Cardigan by jennifer Hagan

I started this two days ago after getting the yarn from Hannah who used it to design a baby blanket for Larissa’s book, Knitalong. It’s the Blue Sky Cotton Organic Cotton. The pattern says to use a size US 9 needle to get gauge, so of course I used a US 5. I have learned that four needle sizes is my magic number. If I go down four needle sizes from the pattern/yarn label, I am almost guaranteed to get gauge.

I actually followed the pattern, I did not alter it at all except for I was going to pick up and knit the sleeves off the flat body pieces after I joined the shoulders. To do that, I decided to block the body first. But now that I have to wait for the body to dry, I’m increasingly eyeing the needles and yarn and thinking about how easy it’ll be to sew in the sleeves once the body is dried and blocked so prettily…

I also finished the Tomten jacket that I don’t know if I mentioned. I used Greenland from Cascade Yarns. Machine Wash, Merino, 4.5 stitches to the inch, AMAZING stitch definition. Practically screams like a wanton slut for cables. I’m going to be giving the Tomten away this Christmas, so I’m knitting some mitts soon to replace it as a shop sample. If you want to see the Tomten, it’s on display next to the Greenland when you first walk in the store.

Also, today I made bread and it did not turn out terrible despite my spectacular ability to bake things at 100 degrees hotter than necessary. Oh dear.

Thievery

I just read this post on Franklin’s blog and I have to say that I’m not just shocked and disgusted but also deeply, deeply concerned about the health of that yarn shop. This is the end of a slow season for yarn retailers, and some of us are just holding out for September and the busy season to kick in. I don’t know this shop’s particular situation or their financial dealings, but I know that such a loss would be disastrous to my store. We could not replace that yarn for months, and all the time losing the sales that stock would’ve brought in.

I know that none of you who read here are the sort who might break into a yarn shop and steal their yarns, but I want you to be extra-conscious of the fact that we are, each and every yarn shop, a small, independent business. There is no huge corporation to absorb our losses, there are no higher-ups who can transfer us to a better branch if this one is losing money. No. When you steal anything, a sample, a skein, a set of needles, you are directly contributing to the destruction of a business that people have fretted and sweated and cried and laughed over. I know that for me, the shop is my life. If somebody were to steal from us in that manner, it would wound me in ways I cannot even describe. The pain would be unbearable, and the loss of trust even moreso.

So, thieves. Whover you are, wherever you are, I hope that someday you can understand the hurt and pain you’ve caused not just one business owner but an entire community of people who, just like you, love yarns and knitting and crochet. But at least those people have the f*cking decency to pay for their yarn, to save up for their yarn, to show the person behind the counter that they give a damn. I hope that every thing you knit brings you no joy, and that you find no rest, that your mind will be in constant turmoil and never let you be rid of the guilt you so richly deserve.

Oops

I just woke up to the radio saying something about rainstorms and over 2,000 lightning strikes in the Portland area last night.

Sorry guys, I did NOT know that Mother Nature was a reader of the blog.

I promise the next time I’m missing sweater weather, I’ll be sure to include a disclaimer.

At least it’s cooled off!

Why I Don’t Knit Socks

It’s the Summer of Sock! And thus I feel somewhat awkward when people ask me what socks I’m working on.

Um. None. I don’t like socks. Here’s why.

• I knit really loosely. To get gauge with sock yarn, I have to use double zeroes or smaller. No. Thanks.
• I have biggish feet and I don’t know anybody I love enough to make socks for except my neighbours and even then I’ve only knitted them house-socks out of bulky weight wool. A pair in a few hours? YES PLEASE!
• Socks are the devil’s tool.

No, seriously. Here’s a bone-chilling tale for you.

I don’t knit socks because once I woke up and a sock-in-progress was standing over me in my bedroom and it was holding one of the needles high above its ribbing before it realized I’d seen it and then it tried to pretend like it had always been there, laying on the bedside table.

Like I would knit on a sock in bed. If you dropped a double-point you’re liable to wake up with lockjaw, and if I were unable to talk we all know I would surely perish from…something ghastly. Who knows.

Anyway, my point is this: I Miss Sweater Weather!

The Tomten is almost done, I’m on the second sleeve and then it’s just I-Cord and buttons. I may reknit the first sleeve. I’m just not happy with it, but I think I’ll wash the thing first to see how it turns out. My devotion to Zimmermann and garter stitch are unwavering. I once said “I think I could happily knit nothing but ZImmermann projects for the rest of my life.” and it looks as though that was a self-fullfilling prophecy!

Mark your calendars kids, because I’ll be giving a talk on Elizabeth Zimmermann on October 22nd, from 6pm to 7:30. That’s a Wednesday, for you what have jobs to come home from. We’re going to cover the life and philosophy of our dear ‘Liz as well as some of her best-known projects. Kind of like a best hits of album with a special biographical booklet. Anyway, it’s sure to be fun and I believe the cost is just $12.00

Coming Soon to This Blog!

I am doing several things right now that are precluding my bloggage.

• I’m working on an article for This Week In Ravelry about LYS employees.
• Working until 11:30 tonight for the Knitting Olympics event at the store.
• Knitting shop samples and exchange sweaters.

I hope that ya’ll will join us tonight at the shop for the Opening Ceremonies. We’ve got TV and cable all set up.

To explain that last bullet there, Stevanie and I are knitting sweaters for each other as an exchange. I frequently want to wear things I have no interest in knitting, and I know some of you feel this way too, so Stev and I have decided to knit sweaters for each other. If you have a friend you love or maybe just know a knitter you like and trust enough you should try it. It’s really fun, we’ve been teasing each other about who will get done first. It’s totally gonna be her because I keep saying I’m going to finish first but she hasn’t found the last skein I need for hers.

And you don’t have to swap sweaters, you could swap anything. Maybe you want a shawl and your friend wants a Dr. Who scarf. Whatever you and your friend decide on, it’s major fun.

Oh, and what would YOU knit with a light worsted/dk weight yarn that’s 50% Merino Wool, 25% Rabbit Angora, and 25% Polyamide? ‘Cause I’m thinking….Almost anything. Anyway, that’s the yarn Invernal that we have at the shop and I’ve noticed that nobody seems to be showing it the love. You know what that means: Store sample time!